What Gives You A Sense Of Being A Mother?
Looking back on our experiences in motherhood, many of us may point to the first time we had a sense of being a mother. The exact moment is different and unique to every woman, but it is always special.
Maybe it was right away you saw a positive pregnancy test. Or, maybe it was the first time you felt your child kick or held him or her in your arms for the first time.
What gives you a sense of being a mother?
Today, I would like to share my own personal experience. I want to talk about the times when I feel like a mother… Where I am suddenly reminded of the huge privilege and responsibility I carry. No matter when it happens to you, I am sure you will be able to relate to the following points.
When I noticed my baby growing inside me
Each time I looked at my stomach and reflected on the miracle that was taking place inside. Or, when I felt his kicks inside me, starting with gentle puffs that, over time, became so strong that they kept me up at night…
Or, maybe it was when I stood face to face with my little child for the first time, rocking him in my arms. This is where I knew, for the first time, that I was someone’s mother. When his warm skin came in contact with mine and I listened to his small, but powerful, cry.
Breastfeeding gave me a sense of being a mother
Why did I feel like a mother for the first time? The first time I breastfed my baby, with a clumsy feeling and doubt about myself. The truth is, it felt weird, but, at the same time, it was amazing. And, the long nights where I barely slept because my baby needed me… They were tough but I would not trade them for anything else in the world.
When my heart breaks
I also feel like a mother every time my heart breaks into a thousand pieces. It breaks, and then heals again, over and over again. Why? Because of my own fears and worries, combined with the overwhelming love I feel for my child.
The nights I cry myself to sleep, I feel, without a doubt, like a mother. What a wild feeling when you are disabled by doubt for yourself. I think about whether I am doing things right or whether I am, in a way, failing my little child. And, I worry about the day my child will leave to confront the world without me.
I feel like a mother when my child needs me
When my toddler needs me to save his hair, tie his shoes or have his diaper changed, I feel like a mother. Or when he just needs me to lie next to him in his bed or take him out to the bathroom in the middle of the night. And, of course, when I clean up after vomiting and measure his temperature, I feel like a mother.
When I serve meals, play cards or go on adventures… When my child comes to me to do something, or just to ask what’s for lunch. Sometimes, I look at him, at his little face and giant smile, and I know I must have done something right.
When I have to cancel my plans
Being a mother means that things do not always go the way we think they will. For example, when I had to sign up for invitations because I was so pregnant. Or when I had to cancel plans at the last minute because my boy got a fever. And, what about the times I have to be that mother because I choose to prioritize my child’s routines? Yes, I feel, for sure, like a mother in those days.
It gives me a sense of being a mother when I feel my child’s unconditional love
I feel my child’s unconditional love every time he gives me a hug or fills me with kisses. When I’m the only one who can wipe his tears away or soothe his screams. And, when he forgives me for my shortcomings and tells me I’m the best mom, ever.
To be and feel like a mother…
Being a mom has, without a doubt, turned me into the best version of myself. My child has taught me to love with my heart wide open and to choose to see the good in people. To be happy on even the most chaotic days – which, of course, is the case most days.
Furthermore, motherhood has taught me to forgive, to work hard, to be compassionate, kind, patient, and, most of all, to be humble.
Taking care of another human being has taught me what it means to be completely selfless. And, creating a family with my partner and caring for our son together has shown me the true meaning of love. Now, I know that love is greater than anything else.
When did you first feel like a mother?
So, if you ask me; “When did you feel like a mother for the first time?”, I would say; “A million times”. There are so many moments – the smallest details and the biggest milestones. And, suddenly, I get caught up in that tidal wave by a feeling that I’m someone else’s.
However, if I have to narrow it down to just a few things, I will say…
- When my baby was born and I witnessed the miracle of my life for the first time.
- The day my child first said the word; “mother”.
- Every time I experience what only a mother can: strength combined with exhaustion, frustration mixed with emotion, fear mixed with pure self-confidence.
This juxtaposition of emotions does not occur every day. In fact, some days actually go pretty smoothly. But, when I have one of those days, the feeling of being a mom gets so much stronger. I have a heart as a mother and I will always be ready and willing to give my child my all… to protect, to serve and, most importantly, to give all the love I have to offer.
So, what about you? When did you first feel like a mother?
