Arguing In Front Of Children Is A Bad Idea

Moments of worry and anger can cause us to make the wrong decisions. In cases where we are furious at our partner, it is possible to forget one very important aspect: it is always best not to quarrel in front of children.

It is also important to assess how this type of behavior can affect them. Every couple in the world quarrels. Even the happiest couples go through hard times.

It is a necessary part of learning about each other, and finding a common ground. In this regard,  it is almost inevitable not to quarrel. 

Nevertheless, discussions really have a bad side as we do not know how they will end. We need to keep in mind that reason can be thrown aside in these moments,  especially when we are passionate about nature.

As a result, arguing in front of children is not the best solution. If there are children present, it is best to put your anger on hold and put the discussion aside until you are alone.

As we will see, this reservation can avoid significant harm to the well-being of our children.

Why we should avoid arguing in front of children

1. They are not mature enough to understand what is happening

Young children are not prepared to face adult problems. Quarreling in front of the children involves them in these matters, which is in no way their fault or responsibility to resolve.

Interpreting the words that children hear can produce negative emotions, including guilt, insecurity, sadness, and fear.

2. We set a bad example by arguing in front of children

It’s not exactly news that children look up to their parents as role models. What type of lesson do we teach them if we quarrel over disagreements, even with someone we love as much as our partner?

We need to do the exact opposite: help them value dialogue, understanding and listening when resolving conflicts. 

Confused children

When witnessing arguments between two people as close as their parents,  children may feel obligated to choose side. In these cases, even if they do not necessarily show it, they may feel confused after hearing each parent’s version.

These feelings can lead to mistrust and even resentment towards the parents. Obviously, it takes time to repair such a significant damage to a parent-child relationship.

4. Stress

The traumatic experience of witnessing parents arguing can make children feel stressed. As a result, their focus will shift away from schoolwork and learning, requiring their concentration.

Stress in childhood can cause physical and psychological symptoms. Furthermore, it can trigger more serious disorders, such as anxiety, panic attacks and learning difficulties.

5. It can set a precedent for violence

Unfortunately, we can not neglect the fact that many arguments lead to acts of violence by one of the parties. In addition to the obvious harm it can cause to the victim,  there are few things that are more negative for children than witnessing such acts. 

We do not just want to present violence as a form of problem solving. We will also create serious negative consequences according to the mental and emotional health of our children.

Do children need to see reconciliation?

Some people also say that you should not always avoid arguing in front of children. They think it’s a way to show that life contains problems and that not everything will always be perfect.

Obviously,  it is essential to teach them the correct way to solve problems. This must be based on, most importantly, respect, empathy and communication. We should be sensible and sound when we have this kind of conversation.

When it comes to reconciliation, it is good to emphasize the other party’s virtues and show signs of affection, such as hugs and caresses.

When peace has returned, you can both explain to the children that you regret what has happened and will try to avoid it happening again. It is very important for children to feel that the family unit is whole again.

In conclusion, you need to make it clear  that this should only happen when you are sure that the interaction will be successful. Otherwise, the child will be vulnerable to the risks mentioned earlier, which will only be detrimental to his or her well-being.